Autumn Memories of my Grandmother
Every time I walk through a grocery store this time of year and see the caramel apple wraps, I think of my paternal grandmother.
When my sister went to Kindergarten, I was left with my grandmother all day while my father was working. I was four and this was during the time when my brother, sister, father, and I were living in my grandmother's 2 bedroom tiny little house while my mother was presumably enjoying herself in our 3 bedroom family home that she'd had our father kicked out of.
Sometimes it makes me wonder if it was just part of a plan on my mother's part to have a nice new house all to herself and at the same time rid herself of the nuisance of husband and children. Other times I suspect her thinking was skewed by her drinking and other influences I've heard about. Is it disrespectful to speculate along these lines, and will I be very truly sorry for thinking this way when she's gone?
I remember a few things about those days with my grandmother, other than the time she chased me into the bathroom and broke her paddle swinging at me, but hitting the toilet instead. I don't remember being a bad kid, but dad's always telling me I was "a little imp." Hmm. Small demon, huh? I hope I wasn't as bad as that sounds. I remember plenty of things about everyone around me, but I can't quite get a sense of myself. It's like I don't exist unless I have something which mirrors my reflection back to me.
I remember a time that she bought a watermelon from Mr. Reddick when he came by with his produce truck. She bought a lot of veggies from him, especially sweet corn. The watermelon incident still hurts me to think about it, becaues i sked her if I could carry the melon in from the truck - up the stairs from the street and up the stairs from the yard to the porch - about 8 all together. At first she wasn't going to let me carry it, because it was heavy and she said I'd drop it. (And let's face it, I was a clumsy kid even then at age 4.) But I begged, and she let me do it.
And I dropped the watermelon right in front of the door, on the porch, after I'd managed my way up all those steps. I remember crying for several reasons. First and foremost, I cried because I was really looking forward to eating the watermelon, which was a rare treat. I also cried because I was embarrassed at having screwed up so royally in front of nice Mr. Reddick. I cried because I knew my grandmother was disappointed with me. And last, I cried because I was afraid I was going to get a spanking for dropping the watermelon.
I remember Grandmomma didn't even seem angry about my accident. Maybe a little impatient because of the mess. I guess I was so torn up about the whole thing that she didn't even think about spanking me.
I think Mr. Reddick gave us a second watermelon to replace it, and things worked out better as the day wore on. I don't remember being sad anymore about the watermelon, but I do remember being surprised that he gave us a second melon.
On one of those autumn days when apples were coming in, I remember that she got some of those sheets of caramel that are put over apples on sticks, then placed in the oven to melt down over the fruit. I recall that I asked Grandmomma why the caramel was in those weird sheets instead of in wrappers that I was used to (Dad would sometimes bring home a bag of Brach's Pick-A-Mix candy with caramels in it). She told me that it was so children could make caramel apples without anybody having to get burned melting the caramel.
And then if I'm not mistaken, she told me to stop trying to sneak bites of the caramel wraps before we'd put them on the apples. LOL :D Even now when I pass them in the store, I'm sorely tempted to buy and eat, what is to me a caramel roll up.
I do remember that after the apples were made and I was happily munching on mine, she wasn't eating one. I asked her if she wasn't going to eat one, and she said she'd have sugar problems if she ate all that candy. She would make desserts for us pretty often, and barely touch them or not eat them at all. Maybe her diabetes was the reason she made her pear salad so often - a dessert which never appealed to us children. It was a pear half on a lettuce leaf, with shredded cheddar cheese and a maraschino cherry on top. All I remember ever wanting to eat was the cherry LOL.
When my sister went to Kindergarten, I was left with my grandmother all day while my father was working. I was four and this was during the time when my brother, sister, father, and I were living in my grandmother's 2 bedroom tiny little house while my mother was presumably enjoying herself in our 3 bedroom family home that she'd had our father kicked out of.
Sometimes it makes me wonder if it was just part of a plan on my mother's part to have a nice new house all to herself and at the same time rid herself of the nuisance of husband and children. Other times I suspect her thinking was skewed by her drinking and other influences I've heard about. Is it disrespectful to speculate along these lines, and will I be very truly sorry for thinking this way when she's gone?
I remember a few things about those days with my grandmother, other than the time she chased me into the bathroom and broke her paddle swinging at me, but hitting the toilet instead. I don't remember being a bad kid, but dad's always telling me I was "a little imp." Hmm. Small demon, huh? I hope I wasn't as bad as that sounds. I remember plenty of things about everyone around me, but I can't quite get a sense of myself. It's like I don't exist unless I have something which mirrors my reflection back to me.
I remember a time that she bought a watermelon from Mr. Reddick when he came by with his produce truck. She bought a lot of veggies from him, especially sweet corn. The watermelon incident still hurts me to think about it, becaues i sked her if I could carry the melon in from the truck - up the stairs from the street and up the stairs from the yard to the porch - about 8 all together. At first she wasn't going to let me carry it, because it was heavy and she said I'd drop it. (And let's face it, I was a clumsy kid even then at age 4.) But I begged, and she let me do it.
And I dropped the watermelon right in front of the door, on the porch, after I'd managed my way up all those steps. I remember crying for several reasons. First and foremost, I cried because I was really looking forward to eating the watermelon, which was a rare treat. I also cried because I was embarrassed at having screwed up so royally in front of nice Mr. Reddick. I cried because I knew my grandmother was disappointed with me. And last, I cried because I was afraid I was going to get a spanking for dropping the watermelon.
I remember Grandmomma didn't even seem angry about my accident. Maybe a little impatient because of the mess. I guess I was so torn up about the whole thing that she didn't even think about spanking me.
I think Mr. Reddick gave us a second watermelon to replace it, and things worked out better as the day wore on. I don't remember being sad anymore about the watermelon, but I do remember being surprised that he gave us a second melon.
On one of those autumn days when apples were coming in, I remember that she got some of those sheets of caramel that are put over apples on sticks, then placed in the oven to melt down over the fruit. I recall that I asked Grandmomma why the caramel was in those weird sheets instead of in wrappers that I was used to (Dad would sometimes bring home a bag of Brach's Pick-A-Mix candy with caramels in it). She told me that it was so children could make caramel apples without anybody having to get burned melting the caramel.
And then if I'm not mistaken, she told me to stop trying to sneak bites of the caramel wraps before we'd put them on the apples. LOL :D Even now when I pass them in the store, I'm sorely tempted to buy and eat, what is to me a caramel roll up.
I do remember that after the apples were made and I was happily munching on mine, she wasn't eating one. I asked her if she wasn't going to eat one, and she said she'd have sugar problems if she ate all that candy. She would make desserts for us pretty often, and barely touch them or not eat them at all. Maybe her diabetes was the reason she made her pear salad so often - a dessert which never appealed to us children. It was a pear half on a lettuce leaf, with shredded cheddar cheese and a maraschino cherry on top. All I remember ever wanting to eat was the cherry LOL.
posted by Me at 9:12 PM
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